Don't be an idiot

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Here, you won't find writing that tiptoes around taboo topics, uses political correctness, or otherwise minces words. This site kicks so much ass, it's almost starting to hurt my foot. Too bad my foot is immune to pussy-foot syndrome, which is more than I can say for the rest of the world. Read more about

Read these so you can die happy

08-18-12: Pseudointellectuals

06-20-12: Crying During Sex

06-08-12: Vegetarian Do-Gooders, You're Doing it Wrong

12-21-11: Critique of an Argument Against a Balanced Budget Amendment

06-17-11: Mean Insults and Good Comebacks

03-29-11: Critique of conservative self-satire

03-16-11: This is what stupid looks like

11-02-10: Advice for Horny Muslims

09-23-10: Congress to Prove Theory of Probability with Monkeys and Typewriters

09-15-10: How to Show Your Personality

09-02-10: Smoking Hot Girl in a Sexy Dress

08-30-10: Hot Girls in Bikinis

04-19-10: Red Flags to Look for in Relationships

03-17-10: 10 Reasons You Should Apply to Law School

02-14-10: Myspace, Facebook, and the Social Ineptitude they Foster

01-27-10: The Four Animals Men Need

01-09-09: Waiting for my Nuts to Drop

01-02-09: How not to Argue Part 2

01-01-09: Poker, Driving, and Sex - Everyone's an Expert

01-01-09: How not to Argue

12-16-08: You Might Be a Slut If…

07-17-08: People You Should Hate Part 2

10-24-08: Why We Need Tort Reform

10-23-08: Why Women Are Like Cars

09-04-08: Ineffective Communication

08-28-08: The Reality of Law School

08-28-08: How Not to Make Friends

08-11-08: What is Love?

08-11-08: Sneaky Things to do to People You Hate

08-10-08: Guys Can Be Scumbags Too

08-05-08: How to Deal with Shitty Drivers

08-04-08: Life Direction

08-03-08: Hilarious Sexist Jokes Explained

08-02-08: Out of Body Experience

08-01-08: Redundancy and Unnecessary Repetition

07-01-08: No More Apologies

06-18-08: The Four Animals Women Need

06-18-08: Christian "Logic" at its Funniest

06-17-08: Boiling Frog Syndrome

06-09-08: How to Get the Girl, Not

06-08-08: Choosing Where to Live

06-08-08: Smoking Will Not Help You Get Laid

05-26-08: Skinny Bitch Book Review

05-15-08: Desperate for attention on Facebook? Don't be.

05-03-08: Ladies Night: Helping Sluts Feel Classy Since 1833

04-19-08: Think Before You Talk

04-04-08: Frat Boys Epitomize the Word Douche

03-05-08: I Am as Dumb as I Look

02-21-08: The Effect I Have on Girls

02-15-08: A Day in the Life of my Kitten

02-06-08: Sometimes You Feel Like a Nut

02-04-08: Sex and the City Quotes Make Women Look Bad

12-17-07: You Get What You Give

12-13-07: Advice for Sluts

11-28-07: Reality vs Depression: You're Unique, Just Like Everyone Else

11-28-07: How to Have GREAT Sex

11-19-07: Reasoning with Women is like Pissing in the Wind

11-15-07: People You Should Hate

10-26-07: Sexual Innuendos in Transformers


These articles do not reflect my views and opinions of all women. Just a vast majority. Of course I don't believe that women should be owned, abused, or otherwise treated as inferior to men. However we mustn't overlook the obvious truth that there is a time and a place for women to speak, and that, incidentally, is never in my presence. If you find any of my writing offensive on any level, then my only explanation is that it must apply to you, as a "strong" and "independent" woman without any insecurities (such as "penis envy" or "suppressed lesbian curiosity") would have no reason to become defensive regarding these childish quips. Also, anyone with a shred of common sense would immediately grasp that most if not all of what I write is too absurd to be taken seriously. With all that said, if you don't like what I write, don't fucking read it. Go watch Lifetime. Or Doctor Phil. Otherwise, have a nice day. And by have a nice day I mean go fuck yourself.

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